Sunday, March 9, 2014

on matters of friendship according to Mr. Lewis

Remember last Sunday, a slice of spring,
24 hours before another serving of winter.
Newport News Park

The Four Loves
C.S. Lewis

"In our own time Friendship arises in the same way. For us of course is the shared activity and therefore the companionship on which Friendship supervenes will not often be a bodily one like hunting or fighting. It may be a common religion, common studies, a common profession, even a common recreation. All who share it will be our companions; but one or two or three who share something more will be our Friends. In this kind of love, as Emerson said, Do you love me? means Do you see the same truth? -- Or at least "Do you care about the same truth". The man who agrees with us that some question, little regarded by others, is of great importance can be our Friend. He need not agree with us about the answer.
Notice that Friendship thus repeats on a more individual and less socially necessary level the character of the Companionship which was its matrix. The Companionship was between people who were doing something together -- hunting, studying, painting or what you will. The Friends will still be doing something together, but something more inward, less widely shared and less easily defined ... still travelling companions, but on a different kind of journey ..."

(From the chapter on Friendship. Italicized items are per the original formatting of the text in the book).


d smith kaich jones said...

i had to read this more than once. more than twice, to be honest. it feels like such good timing. a friend - a very close friend - has been diagnosed with something that will require a bit of a fight. we were talking about this, about how she found another friend crying (she thought secretly) over the news. "we love our people", she (the diagnosed friend) said to me, a bit humbled to find herself so loved. that phrase has stuck with me because we do - we love our people. our friends.

i am rambling, but your post of friendship opened me up a bit.